May 25th, 2021 – 972

This week is, not going to plan. Again. See if March was the beginning of recovery, and April was the turning o the tide, May has thusfar been the receding of the tide. Yes the waters returned, and yes they’ve not vanished again, but they’re not as close as I’d like. I also realise writing this, just how much I miss sitting on the seafront and watching the waves pull to and fro. That is the kind of wellness experience I could do with at the moment, but I will settle for easing myself back into the office with a touch more care.

See, while I do not like working from home – at all – I have jumped from barely any walking to 10K a day out of nowhere, and I suspect this is one reason why my mood melted. Yes, exercise is a natural mood booster, and yes walking isn’t over exertion for most people, but I’m not exactly ‘most people’. Whatever it is that causes my fatigue, physical or mental, I added to my burnout by racing back. That’s ok, I can correct for it, and in time it will feel natural to go in every day just like it used to. I just, rushed it a bit.

So that’s a less than subtle segue into MAL, but I do feel I am rushing it. I keep saying ‘let’s take a step back and look at the plot’, but in between work and crashing at home and target I’ve not made time to do so. Moreover, as much as I’d like to decree I shall ‘do better’, I don’t think it’s feasable to take that step back. After all, where would the time come from? I like my main story every day chain and have no intention of breaking it, so should I wait until I have a first draft? Plenty of writers would say I should, because pre-planning is a drug to be used in moderation and the rewrite should be extensive anyway.

I have, at least, written one good scene today. Honestly the quality of my prose has been on a decline for a while now, so it’s a relief to be able to say as much. But, well I finished 1,300 words – yay – eleven minutes ago – boo. I need to get target earlier again…