September 19th, 2019 – 358

Today has been a day of people asking the wrong people. The wrong people in this instance, is me. Given the sheer levels of chaos all around at the moment, this is both inevitable, and hard to untangle. So all in all, today is one of the most stressful days this week and it’s only 10:22. That’s a good start.

Today is going to be a test on all fronts long beyond the working hours of the day itself. I have yet to start 1K for the day, and we’re still in ‘1K+’, the little experiment to see if I can still finish VOL by the 27th. Again, have to stress, that deadline is not set in stone. If I miss it I miss it, and the current chapters do not get uploaded for months yet. All the same, it would be a huge weight lifted if I did get this banked long in advance.

So why is today any different? I hit at least 2,500 words each day so far this week beginning Monday, and I’ve found a good rythem: start at 9PM~, go till 11. Well, tonight I’m at dads, and there is at least a reasonable chance I’ll only be at home at 9:40, and may not jump into writing. It might be 11PM before I even start. That’s, a problem. All that adds up to a two hour delay to sleeping, and I was asleep at gone-Midnight last night. So, 2AM…

I’m not sure what to do. I’m not bound to ‘1K+’, so today could be an exception. That’s all well and good, but there’s no gurantee I’d have the motivation to start again on Friday. I could write after 5PM as I’m not at dads until 6:30, but my willpower will have depleted to unusable levels at that point. Getting to a thousand words in that timeslot is hard enough, and then motivating myself to do it again? At 10 it will be like doing the whole thing again from scratch. 

This isn’t helped by the fact I’m hungry and tired as it is. I’ll have a small thing for breakfast after I finish this, but man do I wish I burned enough calories to have a proper one. But raw economics nips that, eating in the evening is much cheaper than eating in the morning, simple as. I may need to reevaluate this though to find a better solution, as working hungry saps a lot more willpower. Of course if I were more aggresive in finding a path to paid writing, this whole problem becomes moot. But that’s a whole other problem to get to later.