August 9th, 2019 – 317

I hit target yesterday without a single word of VOL, and I’m so relieved. The last month or so taught me a valuable lesson, and it’s one I knew in principle for a long time. My obsessive mindset means if I really latch onto an idea, I can augment my own mind to incorporate it. It’s much harder to remove these ideas. A lot of my personality I constructed myself through consious decision making. And that includes the major flaws, which I now struggle to dismantle and replace.

Which brings me onto writing. I used to write in mad bursts as I described in my mini essay tomorrow. The reason this self destructive habit stuck around so long was this stubbornness. I’ve overruled this with 1K, but the idea of “chaining days” has necroed a lot of the bad instincts of the past. And this is a problem, because chaining days is only a good thing on paper. Projects done faster, less pressure, more time for other reworkings.

I need to work on taking breaks. This is a tough one for a few reasons. 1K does not have breaks by its nature. But nothing in the idea says what I have to write for a reason. I need to figure out how to use that deliberate exclusion to get away from my bad habits.

Thank god it’s Friday.